“José Jalapeño’s ski trip” | Jeff Dunham’s Very Special Christmas Special  | JEFF DUNHAM

“José Jalapeño’s ski trip” | Jeff Dunham’s Very Special Christmas Special | JEFF DUNHAM

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– You know, um, I don’t think
Jose celebrates Christmas. – No? – He said, no, they do
something called Navidad. (laughter) with some chick named Phyllis. (laughter) – Feliz Navidad. – Yeah, that bitch. (laughter) (applause) – That means Merry Christmas in Spanish. – Ole! (laughter) – Here he is. – Jose Jalapeno on a Stick! (applause) – Good evening, Jose, and Merry Christmas. – Gracias, senor, it’s
good to see you both, Senor Dun-ham and Peanut. – Yeah, you know we’re
talking about Christmas. – I love Christmas. – What the hell is Chreesmas? – He said Christmas. – No, no, it was Chrees-mas. – Are you making fun of my accent? – Ches. – I understand you guys just
went on your first ski trip. – Yes, Jose and Achmed saw
snow for the first time ever! – How was the skiing? – Great! – I had to snowboard. – Stick. (laughter) – So, Jose, did you dress
warmly for the trip? – Si. – What did you wear? – A scarf. (laughter) – And one boot. (laughter) I totally shoulda just worn a garden hose. (laughter) – You know what he could
use as a rain coat? A condom. (laughter) (applause) – All right, so how did the trip go? – It was a disaster. – Really? – Si – What happened? – Achmed broke his leg. – His bone was sticking out. (laughter) – It’s always sticking out. – Did you put a splint on it? – Of course. – What did you use? – Me. (laughter) (applause) – So, when did this happen? – During the avalanche. – Avalanche? – Achmed started it. – We told him not to bring that bomb! – He had a bomb? – On a stick. (laughter) – And why did Achmed have a bomb? – I think he’s a workaholic. (laughter) – So what happened after the avalanche? – We were trapped in
the snow for three days. – Wow, did you have anything to eat? – Jalepeno. (laughter) – You’re a sick bastard. – We were finally rescued by a St Bernard. – But the dog took Achmed
and buried his ass. (laughter) – And his head, and his
feet, it was hilarious! – Why didn’t you help Achmed? – We were laughing too hard. – I want to get back to the Christmas. Jose, how do you celebrate the Holidays? – We wake up in the morning– – And then they take a nap. (laughter) I’m kidding, I know they work very hard. They run to the border and
decorate all the barbed wire. (cheering) – Jose does not run to the border. – You’re right, he goes
doing, doing, doing. – Jose, what does Christmas mean to you? – It’s the day Jesus was born. – I didn’t know your gardener
was born on Christmas. (laughter) – Jesus! Happy Birthday, man. It’s okay, you can skip the leaves. (laughter) – Jose, what do you want for Christmas? – I think he needs a bigger stick. – That’s not what your mother said. (cheering)

100 thoughts on ““José Jalapeño’s ski trip” | Jeff Dunham’s Very Special Christmas Special | JEFF DUNHAM”

  1. Peanut: I think he needs a bigger stick.
    Jose: That's not what your mother said.

    Puss in Boots Oooh Cat: Oooooooooh!

  2. Jeff: Did you put a splint on it?
    Peanut: Of course
    Jeff: What'd you use?
    Jose: Me

    That part killed me ?????

  3. Jeff Dunn:Why did you not help Acmed
    Joes:Because we were laughing to hard
    Me:Laughing So Hard
    LOVE YOU GUYS ?❤?❤?❤?❤

  4. Do you ever have a interpreter for your shows. Let me know. I want to come see you in November in Springfield Missouri. ❤️???

  5. Jeff: When did that happen?
    Peanut: During the avalanche.
    Jeff: There was an avalanche?
    Jose: Achmed started it.
    Peanut: We told him not to bring that bomb!
    Jeff: He had a bomb!?
    Jose: On a steek.
    Jeff: And why did Achmed have a bomb?
    Jose: I think he's a workaholic.

  6. that was so funny my parents watch that show and it was helirious Jeff dunham is the best and Bob the Builder is my favorite show and Jeff dunham is my favorite show too both of them are. (which one is your favorite: Jeff dunham, Bob the Builder or both. Time is ticking)

  7. God! I hate people in the audience with annoyingly loud laughter. Makes me want to get up and punch them in the face. In this case, one or two women in the audience. That kind of laughter is really distracting from the performance.

  8. So Can someone stick something very large in that very big mouth laughing so loud like a condom put three in that mouth . Sorry Jeff I can no longer listen to your show with a woman with a big mouth stuff with very large CONDOM hoping that someone can blow air into her mouth and flip her ass away from your show

  9. Jose The bone was sticking out
    Peanut It's always sticking out
    Jeff Did you put a splint on it
    Peanut Of course
    Jeff What'd you use
    Jose Me
    Died of laughter ??????

  10. Jeff: He had a bomb?
    José: On a steek.

    I’m starting to think had the Demoman loaned Ačçćhmed his Ullapool Caber.

  11. i love how jeff brings so much life to his puppets that you can forget they aren't actually alive. also great how by comparison to the puppets, jeff ends up being the "voice of reason" while the puppets are the ones usually saying the offensive/"racist" jokes.

  12. "So José did you dress warmly for the trip?"
    "What'd you wear?"
    "A scarf."
    That's some Cartoon animal level shit.

  13. Peanut : i think he needs a bigger stick.
    José : that's not what you're mother said…
    Imma write that for future references

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